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January 14, 2014

Ballad of the US Navy SEAL Teams as Seen In The Lone Survivor Movie

Below is a personal favorite. I used a short key at the bottom to clarify a few terms.



BALLAD of The US Navy SEAL Teams

I’m a lover, a figther

An American UDT SEAL diver.

That’s a rootin tootin shootin paratroopin

SCUBA diving demolition double cap crippin’


Last of the bare-knuckle fighters

No muff too tough, I dive for five

Tuck, suck, fuck, nibble and chew

I dine and interwine, masturbate,

ejaculate and copulate.

I Drive Navy trucks, that’s 2by’s, 4by’s, 6by’s

and those big mother fuckers that go Shhh Shhh

and bend in the middle.

Been around the world twice

and talked to everyone once. Seen two

white whales fuck and

been to two

pigmy picnics.

Met a man from Nantucket with a marble head and wooden cock

and ladies, if you don’t like my face you can sit on it!




Cap crimpers-tool used to prepare demolition charges.  Mainly to secure blasting caps to detonation cord.

2by’s, 4by’s-big ass trucks.

Muff-I hope I don’t have to explain this one.

UDT-Underwater Demolition Team

Frogman-term used to describe Navy SEALs and UDT

About the Author

is a former U.S. Navy SEAL with combat deployments to Afghanistan, and Iraq. During his last tour he served as the west coast sniper Course Manager at the Naval Special Warfare Center. He is CEO of Force12 Media , a SOFREP contributing editor, and a New York Times best selling author (The Red Circle & Benghazi: The Definitive Report). Follow Brandon on Facebook, Twitter or his website.

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  • templar 6

    Damn hard to watch and sit still wanting to be there so bad. Kind of numb after words. My worst nightmares all played out...  Deepest respect

  • gipbmac

    Great post Brandon -  I finally saw the movie yesterday.  I'll definitely be seeing it a few more times!

  • Minou_Demimonde

    There are things that I will never understand, and the desire to...well, you know...that's just so odd. Men. I adore them. I think that they are delicious. But I don't get some things. Yeah, the whole culture of the SEALs is so conducive to working with women. Sometimes I'm amazed that they let you back in public without decontamination procedures--unless they do those when you retire, and don't ever mention them. Brandon? ;-)

  • EileenHuber

    briscoe33 That one made me smile.  Thanks

  • EileenHuber

    Virginstateofmind  I'm right there with ya.