Wally

I told him that I would, but in truth I had no intention of considering it at all.

I had a short deadline to be out of the house and the options were few and far between. Over the course of about a week, I could feel the deadline baring down on me and relented. I sat in my truck in an empty Kroeger parking lot and dialed Steve.

“Steve” I said.

“Yes, what’s up brother” he replied.

“Hey, I have been thinking about it and I think I might be interested in living with your dad” I replied. Steve was ecstatic. Mind you I made sure to leave several escape clauses. I put everything into storage, made sure not to sign a lease, refused to pay a deposit and told Steve “If there is one single issue, I am out of there, no questions asked.”

Steve replied wryly and said “Ok, brother, Ok!”

Part of the deal was that in exchange for lower rent I would help out around the house—as I had anticipated and as I had feared. But before long Wally and I found our groove. He would be up at 0400, me, a little later at 0500. I would make oatmeal for him and feed his Rhodesian Ridgeback before leaving for PT and work. At the end of the day, I’d return home, make dinner, do the dishes, and tidy up. On weekends I would mow the lawn, do the shopping, and take care of the trash and other chores. Dinner was eaten in the living room in the EZ Boy recliners while we watched Bones reruns. Wally loved Bones and he DVRed every episode. We called the house the “team room.” While it was an unusual arrangement, before long it began to take on a certain familiarity and appeal. To my surprise, we were roommates and on the fast track to becoming great friends.

As the trust began to build, Wally began to tell me his life story. Wally had joined the Idaho national Guard at the age of 15- there were different rules back then. One year while at Annual Training (AT) his family moved from Idaho to California. When Wally returned home from AT, he found a note pinned to the barn that read “Son, we moved to California (Address), we left the Harley in the barn, join us when you can.” Naturally, Wally road that Pan Head Harley from Idaho to California. It didn’t take long for Wally to grow tiresome of California and seek out an Army recruiter. Before long, Wally was sworn into Active Duty and shipped to Japan as part of the1st Cavalry, the 24th Infantry Division and the 34th Infantry Regiment in late 1949. This would be the first of several fateful events in Wally’s legacy. A few short months later Wally would find himself in Korea, 10 days after hostilities broke out in June of 1950. By April of 1951 Wally would be wounded and receive the 1st of his four purple hearts. By Jan 1953 he had reenlisted and returned to Korea this time serving with the 2d Infantry Division 23rd Infantry Regiment.

As time wore on, I came to know what a legend he was in a community that is filled with legends. Wally fought in Korea and Viet Nam, two times each. Some of his decorations and awards included the Purple Heart w/3 Oak Leaf Clusters, Bronze Star Medal w/Valor device and 2 Oak Leaf Clusters, Army Commendation Medal w/Valor device, Air Medal, Armed Forces Expeditionary Medal, National Defense Service Medal w/Oak Leaf Cluster, Vietnam Service Medal w/ Silver Service Star and 1 Bronze Star, Vietnam Campaign Medal w/60 device, UN Medal, Korean Service Medal, Army of Occupation Medal (Japan) 4 Overseas Bars, 15 Campaign Stars, Vietnam Cross of Gallantry s/Palm, Bravery Gold Medal of Greece, Combat Infantry Badge (CIB) w/Star, Master Parachutist badge, Vietnam and Greek Parachutist badge. He personally knew Roger Donlan, Barry Sadler, and Nick Rowe. He would go on to serve as a Ranger Instructor (RI) and later a Green Beret starting with A/1/10 SF. He rose through the ranks from Private to Major before retiring.

Most nights we would sit, basking in the glow of the big screen TV, mostly in silence, occasionally talking about his favorite topics- golf, dogs, guns, (especially the .45 cal. 1911, “the only real handgun that should be assigned to SF”) and investing in silver.

One day our conversation took a different turn. After covering the usual- the price of silver, why the Rhodesian Ridgeback dog is the far superior breed of dog on earth or ruining the plot of the episode of Bones that we were watching, Wally said something that caught me off guard, without warning, without segue “There was this one battle” he began. “It was early in my first tour to Korea. We had just fought a several days long battle against the Chinese with heavy casualties.”

I quickly assessed what was playing out, that Wally was about to really open up to me. He continued “We were searching for our dead and wounded, going from foxhole to foxhole clearing them one-by-one.” I quietly acknowledged with an “ah huh” careful to say just enough to encourage him but not to say too much as to interrupt.

He paused, took some deeper breaths before continuing and said, “I was by myself when I popped up over this one foxhole.” My heart rate was climbing as the gravity of this moment settled in. Wally’s tone dropped as he continued “I peered over the edge, and I saw him staring back at me with terror in his eyes.”

He paused again, choosing his words slowly. “He was wounded, a young Chinese soldier, he couldn’t have been more than 16, just a kid.”

My throat tightened as I swallowed my emotions in complete silence. Wally paused for another long period. He was beginning to choke up. “His guts were completely hanging out; and he was covered in dirt and blood. He had gangrene.”

Wally grew up on a farm and every farm boy knows what gangrene is, knows that there comes a point when there is no going back, and worse- he knows the smell. I shared a farming background in common with Wally, I knew the stench of gangrene, I knew where this story was going as I felt the weight settle onto my chest.

Another long silence and then he said “I had to shoot him. I had no choice, he is the one that still haunts me, I see his face when I sleep.” I froze and listened with intensity and Wally concluded his initial effort to open up to me with “I have never told anyone that story, not even Stephen and I am not sure why I can’t.”

And just like that, the next episode of Bones was queued up and nothing more was said that night.

After that our conversations slowly shifted from dogs and the price of silver to more weighty matters mingled in. We began talking late into the evening about war, and death of love and life, of setbacks and triumphs. We began to share things that neither of us had said and no other human had ever heard.

Wally, the consummate leader that he was, set the example for me. He knew there were things inside of me that needed to come out, that needed the light of day. He knew that when we give utterance to those things that we most want to keep buried that they would no longer hold power over us. On that day Wally was the ‘breach man.’ He created a safe space, framed in trust, mutual respect and free of judgment. I would cautiously and slowly wade into that space. Over the following months, I would start to reach down into my soul and find the things that I was hiding from and carefully and slowly find ways to express what I was feeling.

I do not know when I had the realization, but there came a point that I knew who the real nursemaid was and who needed the nursing. Wally carefully, slowly, methodically nursed me back to health- both physically and emotionally over those eighteen months. Ultimately, I would get orders for Afghanistan with follow on orders to SOCOM. Although our time as roommates had run its course, Wally would remain a key figure in my life for another twelve years.

Ultimately, he would become a father figure to me.

Wally passed away on Oct 25th, 2023, at the age of 92. When I think about those days at “the Raeford house” I struggle to articulate what those days mean to me. But I will be forever grateful for the wisdom and patience that man had and the way in which he led by example. That he walked through the breach, setting the example for me, and the example of what it means to be part of this Regiment, what it means to be part of this fraternity, and what it means to “leave no man behind.”

DOL, Wally, DOL.