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Womans Self Defense Weekly: The Importance of Mental Rehearsal

by · May 3, 2012 · Posted In: Admin
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The time to rehearse for a self defense emergency is not when an event is happening for real. That’s why in the SEAL Teams we constantly train and rehearse for worst case scenarios.

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This week I want to talk about the importance of mental visualization as I discussed in “Flow”.  A lot of times just acting and not being paralyzed is enough to thwart an attacker. Practicing specific scenarios will help prepare you mentally to deal with real situations.  I wish we didn’t have to worry about it but unfortunately threats to woman these days are pervasive in the world we live in.

There are two scenarios I want to talk about that put theory to practice:

1. Mugging-if someone is just after money or material items and it looks like they’ll take it and leave you alone then give it to them and get out alive.  I mean this, don’t try and be a hero and get shot or stabbed (it happens) over $100 or your favorite Hermes or Coach purse.  Live to fight another day.

Important Statistic From RAINN:

1 out of every 6 American women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime (14.8% completed rape; 2.8% attempted rape).

2. Rape or Abduction-this is a scenario where you need to fight for your life because if you don’t you’ll likely never be the same again or worse, you’ll wind up dead.  Weirdos like easy targets and nothing makes a freak happier then having a woman who’s paralyzed with fear.  Yell and scream loud (buy a good self defense flash light–it blinds…make sure it’s 500 lumens or more), and get aggressive (e.g.punch, kick, eye gouge, nut kick, etc). The key is as we say in the SEAL Teams, Violence of Action=overwhelm your enemy with aggression and put them on the defense…..AND rehearsal.

helmut-newton-sofrep

Rehearsal: close your eyes before you go to bed at night or in a safe place and imagine yourself in a worse case scenario like above.  Then rehearse your actions, what you’ll do, how you’ll scream and how you will overcome your attacker. Rehearsing this will make you much more prepared for this event in the likely event it happens (see above stats) to you some day.

I hope this was helpful ladies. Look for more and please submit your input to anything else you’d like to see us talk about and make you more prepared out there. After all, not everyone can have a US SOCOM husband or b/f. ;)

-Brandon
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About The Author

Brandon Webb is a former U.S. Navy SEAL with combat deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan, and elsewhere in the Middle East. His last tour in the SEAL Teams was as the Course Manager for the US Navy SEAL Sniper program, arguably one of the most difficult sniper courses in the world. He was formerly a contributing editor for Military.com, and currently the Editor-in-Chief of SOFREP.com. Brandon is regularly featured in the media as a subject matter expert on military affairs. An avid writer, his last two books (The Red Circle, & Benghazi: The Definitive Report) both hit the New York Times best seller list, and his writing has been featured in print, and digital media worldwide. You can follow him on Twitter @BrandontWebb
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DefenseBest
DefenseBest

This is excellence advice. In a crisis situation you will revert to your training, even mental training. The key is to always envision yourself winning.

ThePatriots
ThePatriots

We host several women's defense seminars at our school and work with various organizations to teach women how to get out of trouble as quickly as possible. Many of the points that you've listed are the same ones we cover. When training our women (girls ages 10 and up) we simulate live situations such as loading their car with groceries, being attacked and forced into the back seat/trunk/etc. We use various lighting techniques (strobes/fog machines/black lights/drunk goggles/you name it) to increase the stress level of the combatant as she defends her life from one or more attackers.

 

I appreciate you guys for posting this sort of information and hope you'll continue to do so. In my experience, I've learned that in order to teach the defenses effectively, we have to make the attacks seem as real as possible. Sometimes, our students flip out and cry - even in a controlled environment where they know their attacker (a trusted instructor) and still, they flip out. They psychology behind a rape is a very tricky and tough topic for most people to cover and when we cover it, we do not sugar coat it. It's real. It sucks. Our training can and will be the difference between life/death and/or victim/survivor. I'm not posting this in order to endorse any type of martial art over another one. I'm simply posting this because I've trained hundreds of women and thousands of students over the past decade and have worked with those that are recovering from being raped and those that are taking a strong stance so that they can walk in peace. 

 

Keep up the excellent posts, SOFREP! And know that this information can and will make a difference in someone's life b/c I will refer my students to your site as a case in point referral to the statistics you've posted and the methods you've covered.

Dutch
Dutch like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

My dad told me way back when, "women make us all better because they fill in the gaps that we have. Lets face it, we're assholes at times and they're not...... most of the time. If I ever see you mistreating one ill kick your ass and if you ever see someone mistreating one, I expect you to do the same." I was a bit afraid of my dad growing up, maybe a healthy respect is a better way of describing it so, I just said yes sir, but I now realize how true it is. Stay safe ladies and since you already have your whole life in your purse, throw a 9 in there while your at it. Well written as always Brandon, hope your doing well. 

 

PatrickM
PatrickM like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

Sure Fire E 2 D LED defender flashlight works. Had a intoxicated man in the back of my Ambulance go off on us.Shined light in his eyes he immediately covered his eyes, hit him  with a chest strike with flashlight ,down he went.And we were able to restrain him.And this was big dude drunk and drugged up.

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

 @PatrickM

 The SureFire is one of the greatest tools you can have. Put your hand on a Taz or holster peoples defense is up immediately, shine the light and they squint and try to cover, leaving you many options. Doesnt look like a self defense tool but it is.

Old PH2
Old PH2 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

 @ArcticWarrior  @PatrickM  "So, your Honor my client felt threatened by the defendant use of that light magnification module as an offensive weapon."  The judge says, "So, you're telling me your client was scared of the light?"  Laughter ensues and the defendant is free to shine the light on injustice where ever it may be encountered.

 

You gotta love our court system.  

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Ben K
Ben K like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @ACS To me, a flashlight makes infinite sense because of the legal problems and other emotional hassles that would result from having to wound (potentially fatally) someone, even in self-defense.  Never thought about the flashlight thing before it was mentioned on SOFREP.

FormerSFMedic
FormerSFMedic like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 4 Like

@Ben K @ACS - The flashlight should be a part of everyone's everyday carry (EDC). I've carried a number of different Surefire model handheld lights for many years now and have trained extensively in their use. You would be surprised at the things you can do with a high quality light. As a matter of fact, my light is my first go to self defense tool. Think about it, you can't go walking out to your car in the middle of the night outside the WalMart parking lot with a gun in your hand. However, you CAN have your flashlight ready, in your hand just as a precaution and no one is going to look twice. You don't have to try and "draw" the light from concealment under stress wasting precious time. In many cases just shining the light at someone that is "lurking" is enough to make them think twice, especially if they can't even see you. Criminals prey on the weak. If you hit them with 120 lumens of light, then they've completely lost the initiative. If they do still decide to attack, it going to be hard to get hold of you when they can't see past the light. That buys you time to run or if they are close, you can draw the light back and come right down on they're face or collar bone with the head of the light. OUCH! The high intensity tactical flashlight should be with you at all times. You are much more likely to use it than your gun and there is little to no liability when using it.

Old PH2
Old PH2 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

 @Ben K Just Remember, a laser has legal liabilities.  Permanent eye damage to an attacker could result in a civil suit against you.  Stick to a bright flashlight, in a pinch it can be a Kubaton.  And remember, blind them, scream, and run like hell.  Do not stick around, put some distance between you.  Live to fight another day.      

LCpl X
LCpl X

 @MistiM 

 

*** and it took 2 hours for them to respond she may have been pissed. ***

 

It depends on how the call was generated, whether she called 911 and said she found cherries in the fridge, or a truck tried to run her off the road, but now long gone, etc. etc. If you wanna generate a coded call, meaning lights and siren, or just get their fast, you have to mention that you're in danger, ie you think the suspect is still behind you following you, or in the house. Calls aren't answered as first come first serve, they are serviced by degree of emergency.

LCpl X
LCpl X

 @MistiM  

 

I don't think theyre that dirty in the east, but I did hear when Bratton came out here he laughed and said something like, you guys call this corruption? LOL. Depts in CA have nothing on Chicago and NY depts.

 

But going back to the police report, that's good that's pretty high grade stuff, ADW/car. Although you really have no named susp, I think you can get something started as Artic said re restraining order, start getting familiar with the court system. Cops give you a copy of the facesheet and a records number, then a week or so you can ask for the full report, and start following up. 

 

If she was a drama queen, then ensure in their next interface with detectives or sgts, she's drama free and approach this from a law enforcement perspective, de-conflict and you'll get better traction, working relationship with local PD. I can't stress this enough, most cops are assholes, you kinda want them to be, so there's a certain way to get them to work more for you--and it's not by being a drama queen.

MistiM
MistiM like.author.displayName 1 Like

@Old PH2 @ArcticWarrior @LCpl X it was reported as an assault w/deadly weapon w/car although I suspect when they left they changed it to overreactive female who never should have been let out of the kitchen. She's not typically the drama queen type, but considering her baby was in the car and it took 2 hours for them to respond she may have been pissed. It's a tiny town in New York where your neighbor knows if you're out of toilet paper and she was on an unlit back road. Hopefully the creeper will fade into the night. I'll let you know.

Old PH2
Old PH2 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

 @ArcticWarrior  @MistiM I can't understand the local PD reaction unless she, don't hate me for saying this: came off like a drama queen.  I will tell you this the idiot chasing her got off lucky, my wife was cornered in a grocery store with our oldest at 9 months.  The store manager had to break it up, she broke the guys nose and punched him repeatedly in the nuts.  Dude slipped away or we would have pressed charges on him.  To this day I know where he lives and keep an eye on him, if you know what I mean.

 

A woman with a child will, no shit, kill your dumb ass.  The fright brings on the adrenaline, next thing you know she's fighting like a cornered lioness.

 

Driving to a Police substation is always a good idea.  Having a friend stay over is good too.  A dog in the house may be a deterrent she could live with.

 

Keep us in the loop, nothing I hate more than shit birds messing with women.

LCpl X
LCpl X like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @MistiM  

 

Just curious what type of police report was generated and what crime was reported?

 

Stalking? Assault w/ a Deadly Weapon w/ vehicle?

 

Cherries in the fridge although creepy and ominous police can't really do a lot with, it's no crime, but a good investigator will take a wider holistic look at all the facts.

MistiM
MistiM like.author.displayName 1 Like

@LCl X @ArcticWarriorthanks guys. Hood tips Arctic. I agree about the cjerries which baffled me about their response. Anything left in your home when you're not there is menacing. It's some creeper's way of saying I can get to you anywhere. You're not even safe in you're own home. I don't care if it's a jar of cherries or a ticking time bomb. zI'll pass the additional info on to het. As usual, you guys are great and thought up some inventive idead I wouldn't necessarilly have thought of. And as you can tell, I can't type worth a damn when I can't see what I'm typing. :)

LCpl X
LCpl X like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @ArcticWarrior @MistiM 

 

Alot of good stuff from Artic, M. I'd add more interface with the local PD, I'm assuming just regular patrol guys waving a lot of these good info off,

 

try getting in touch with Detectives or Watch commanders (Lt./Sgt.). Don't be too pushy or appear too much like a Lifetime channel character, be calm and rational and state your facts, give them stuff to investigate and evidence, not theories.

 

Hope everything works out.

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior like.author.displayName like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 3 Like

 @MistiM  

Wow Misti that is creepy in the worst way. If this guy is really that creepy she needs to be hypervigilent in her situational awareness at all times. She needs to DOCUMENTall of this with your local PD, get something on paper to start, if he really is that much of a A plus stalker, get a restraining order, its only paper but it starts the legal system. Have her give you or someone else his exact description, truck, tag numbers etc, have her check in every hour etc, make sure GPS on phone is enabled, have her get a free locate app for her phone so a loved one can dial in her phones location. If she doesnt have a security system tell her invest in a cheap game/trail cam, can be purchased at Walmart in the sporting section, to set up inside and/or around her house so she can get a good bead on if he is lurking around when she is or isnt home. If she lives by herself get someone to stay, dont open the doors etc, set up the cams and stay with someone else. It sounds potentially dangerous and should be addressed with local PD immediately. Its hard to fathom PD telling her its harmless, someone entered her house without her consent...WTF. As far as the truck thing, wow, speeding and panicked driving may get herself injured as well as others, or worse, cell phone and 911 as a road rage type incident, keep doors locked and keep moving towards a major road etc. I dont know her exact situation, location or this stalker but this is major league scary. And again SITUATIONAL AWARENESS AT ALL TIMES

 

MistiM
MistiM like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

@LCpl X She's got a good suspect, his vehicle matches the description of the one she saw at night as best she could tell. Police were compketely uninterested. I've given her copies of all the articles here as soon as she called me. The biggest problem, she's a single Mom who relocated to another state and routinely travels with a small baby. . shit storm waiting to happen. She's talking movong back.

LCpl X
LCpl X like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @MistiM  

 

It's probably someone she already knows, or came in contact with. Have her list all possible suspects, the cherries are too creepy for it to be a random gift, by a random stranger. Look into Mexicans, don't mean to be racist here, but in Socal, there're a bunch of rapes, by dishwashers, busboys, gardeners, etc. they see a nice looking girl, follow her, come back for her. Although I don't think they'll leave cherries, that's more of a creepy White dude in the city MO.

 

Are there menfolk she can get a hold of, to help her out? If close family/friends aren't around, consider getting friendly with local PD/sheriffs, personalize this case for them, so you become part of their tribe, hence receive personalized protection.

 

But most importantly, she's gonna have to protect herself, no one can do it for her. That's already covered here.

MistiM
MistiM like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @Old PH2 @LCpl X @ArcticWarrior Looking for some good immediate practical advice here. A friend of mine came home yesterday to find a mysterious jar of cherries in her fridge. We had a few laughs, made a couple jokes, she called everyone she knew to double check, no one left the cherries. Several hours later after leaving her house, a truck waiting with it's lights off pursued her quickly, the driver tried getting her to get out of her car (on a dark back road). Fortunately her Mom and was with her because she panicked and froze. Her mom instructed her to floor it and put as much distance between her and the truck as possible. Eventually she was able to lose him. The only advice she got from the police after a 2 hour response time was A) lock your doors and B) the cherries were probably coincidental, but if not, they're harmless - they're just cherries :/  Major problem here being, aside from the fact that this ass clown made 2 majorly bold moves in one day is the fact she routinely travels with a 5 month baby...read infant carrier making reaching for knife, flashlight, etc. complicated to say the least. Any words of advise gentlement?

 

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior

 @ACS  @ArcticWarrior  @Old

 Yeah Head went off the rez didnt he? Nah music is trans generational. For mellower stuff I use APC, Tool. BFMV does a few good Metallica covers. Hey what ever gets you motivated. I find it ironic that the Sheik himself had a large collection of Japanese porn, so me thinks when they throw the purity thing around they dont include themselves

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior

 @ACS  @ArcticWarrior  @Old

 Lol... the Police of Vice and Purity in Iran, as well as most of our Taliban types, think music, and clothing or anything Western makes people do "impure" things, too which I whole heartedly agree, for personal motivation I always used a little Metallica "Creeping Death" luckily I never had any Redline available, but did always try to acquire Penthouse Forum, and usually could find one for enough items.

Old PH2
Old PH2 like.author.displayName like.author.displayName 2 Like

 @ACS It's definitely a man's world over there.  The problem is instead of a code of chivalry like what developed in the west they have a THUG system that bullies men, women, and innocent children into submission.  It's a black eye on the face of this earth.  

Old PH2
Old PH2 like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @ArcticWarrior  @ACS One of the reasons that Taliban outlawed Music:  It inflamed lustful and improper thoughts.

 

The wine is interesting, since it is illegal to buy or sell in Iran.  My father in Law was brought in on charges for making wine.  The family was able to bribe his way out of Evin prison.  Yep, a serious no, no.  He could have been disappeared.

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @ACS  

SureFire makes all different size flashlights for every situation imagineable. Usually near the middle is the model name- 6PX Pro, Backup etc.

 

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @ACS

 Its a rough world out there. Be aware of the situation at all times. The alert zebra doesnt get eaten, the one whos head was down chowing on some savannah grass when the herd bolted becomes Lion Chow.

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior

 @ACS  

Yes rape victims can be charged charged, the charges go as high as death.The example I gave was Iran. Same goes for AF/PAK/SA etc.

 

Revolutionary Guards Col Hossein Yardoosti.

"I believe the raped women's families are to blame, because if they had  proper clothing and if the sound of their music was not so loud, the rapist  would not have imagined it as a depraved get-together," he was quoted as  saying.

Reports said that he was considering legal action against the rape victims  for their behaviour.

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior

 @ACS  

Victims blamed Continue reading the main story “Start Quote

 

If they had proper clothing and if the sound of their music was not so loud, the rapist would not have imagined it as a depraved get together.”

End Quote Colonel Hossein Yardoosti Local police chief

"Those who were raped were not praiseworthy," said the imam of Khomeinishahr, Musa Salemi, in his Friday sermon.

"Only two out of the 14 were related. They had come to our town to party and provoked the others [the rapists] by their wine drinking and dancing."

His sentiments were echoed in comments made by the town's police commander, Revolutionary Guards Col Hossein Yardoosti.

"I believe the raped women's families are to blame, because if they had proper clothing and if the sound of their music was not so loud, the rapist would not have imagined it as a depraved get-together," he was quoted as saying.

Reports said that he was considering legal action against the rape victims for their behaviour.

The response of the authorities has also been questioned in the university rape case. Fellow students pointed out that the campus is tightly-controlled by security services and suggested that the attack could not have escaped their notice.

As they held a candle-lit vigil to support the rape victim, they made accusations of collusion by guards and a cover-up.

 

Old PH2
Old PH2 like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @ArcticWarrior That's on the Family, they have the choice to execute the gal for staining the Family Honor.  The courts generally look the other way.  So if your in a Christian or Jewish family chances are your OK, unless they get a bug up their asses then your dead too.  The court will not generally execute a victim, but the won't defend her either.  FUBAR is a good term for it. 

ArcticWarrior
ArcticWarrior like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @Old PH2

 After the Duke case, and a whole lot more that dont make Natl news, Its fair to say it is too grey an area for he said she said to be a Capital.

As for ChoMos these guys, and ladys, when you talk to them are some of the most charming and normal you may ever meet, very rarely are they creepy, Its part of the ruse they play. When they are inside they just PC up, stay to themselves, you dont even notice them, criminals of the worst kind smart. You will never see Clergy, Bankers, Teachers and Politicians executed for any crime like this, why so many Sandusky defenders? Thats a bigger societal issue.

Old PH2
Old PH2 like.author.displayName 1 Like

 @ACS    @Ben My wife is constantly asking me why rapists and child molesters aren't executed.  She was born in Iran and they regularly preform such judicial theater as a warning to the population.  I guess even the Ayatolahs can get one thing right.

This comment has been deleted

ufridman
ufridman

@BrandonTWebb did you ever get the article I sent you about the combat women in the IDF?