This author has gotten his hands on a truly mind-numbing and depressing piece of propaganda recently promulgated by the U.S. Navy’s Office of Information.  The head of said office, the Navy’s Chief of Information (CHINFO) — the position sounds eerily similar to a “propaganda minister” in some socialist nightmare state — is clearly marshalling his persuasive powers in order to sell what looks to be a turd-burger to the Navy’s enlisted community.

The document in question is a “communication plan,” or strategic communications document, laying out how the Navy’s leadership should “sell” a brand new rating system to the Navy’s enlisted ranks.

For the sake of review, per the Navy Times: “The Navy deep-sixed all of its 91 enlisted ratings titles Thursday [September 29, 2016], marking the beginning of an overhaul of the rigid career structure that has existed since the Continental Navy in a radical shift sure to reverberate through the fleet and the veterans community beyond.”

I had to quote that particular portion of the Navy Times article simply to illustrate the scope of the change that has hit the Navy’s enlisted ranks with this new policy approved by Navy Secretary Ray Mabus and Chief of Naval Operations (CNO) Admiral John Richardson.

The Navy Times article goes on to describe how rating (job) titles that have been around since the 18th century, such as Boatswain’s Mate (BM) and Gunner’s Mate (GM), as well as more recent, but still lore-infused titles like Hospital Corpsman (HM), will go the way of keelhauling and hard-tack biscuits, never to be seen again in the U.S. Navy.  Instead, they will be replaced by “Navy Occupational Specialities” (NOS).

Let us look at some examples, for clarification’s sake.  A SEAL, who currently carries a Special Operator (SO) rating, is now an E300 NOS.  An Explosive Ordnance Disposal (EOD) tech is now an E200.  A Gunner’s Mate is now a B320.  A Quartermaster is now a B450.  And, in an especially ballsy change, at least from what I can tell deciphering the CHINFO communications document, a Hospital Corpsman is now a G000.

Wait, what?

This last example is perhaps the most egregious of the new designations, or NOS, included in the big shake-up.  A “Goo?”  Really?  Is this supposed to reflect a corpsman’s frequent contact with various bodily fluids, as part of his or her job, in some kind of sick joke being payed on corpsmen by an especially sadistic (and/or bored) Personnelman (PN), now a B710 (or is it L510?), crafting the new designations?