I didn’t really do that but it is a wagered consensus that the product is looking very authentic. With that, I could brazenly defend the cops for mistaking a female sex doll for the corps of a decedent woman. It had to be a cruiserweight facepalm moment for all involved. The report also fails to mention the obscure fact than it took the coroner nearly 25 minutes into his assessment — which included the application of a rape kit — to detect that the departed was in fact a sex doll. That alone is a staunch argument to the ostensible reality of the nation’s silicon harem.

The DNA Polymerase Chain Reaction (PCR) test on the doll came back a 98.9 match for siloxane.

Viewing of the doll will be held at Las Vegas this Wednesday from 1300 to 1500 local Georgia time.

Target Department and Discount Retail Store is Harboring a Stone-Cold Dolt

There really is some much wrong in this photo:

Target’s corporate culture likes to think of its workforce as one big happy family. Kind of like a tribe if you will, or better yet a village! Well, we all know what every village has — an idiot. In the case of the circumstances surrounding the photo above, we don’t know if it was a general manager, a floor associate, or perhaps even a specially select committee of brain aneurysms who came up with the idea of that display.

That scene is what’s wrong with our country right now. The reason that the U.S. all by itself accounts for roughly one-third of all the CV-19 corpses, uh… IN THE WHOLE WORLD! That photo is a testament to the gross lack of true understanding of the CV-19 threat. I get mad, really really mad, every time I see shit-for-brains hotpants Nance Pelosi wearing her protective mask down around her chin — for phux’ sake, Mee-Maw… it’s a protective mask, not a goatee!

Oh yeah, back to the photo — no; not yet: American’s are dying of CV-19 at a rate that exceeds the rest of the world by and large due to vanity. Americans will NOT allow themselves to be inconvenienced, not even by a pandemic. Has anyone (else) noticed that in this national struggle of bitch-ass bickering over mask/no mask, the ones who are opposed to masks are the one’s who don’t want to wear them? That’s the driving factor in their decision-making — vanity.

So in Target, we have a display rack with designer Amazing Technicolor Dream Masks and a mirror that encourages people to try on all the masks until they find the one that looks best on them. Just how does your face look in a mask — kinda like a mask, right? Hell, I chose not to wear a mask at all because then people wouldn’t be able to appreciate my pouty-pouty lips.

The mirror… step up all ye persnickety phux and try on masks. Now a person is going to put on a few masks, breathe in them all, then put them all back except one, and the next person is going to try on used masks. Now YOU are going to grab a mask that was breathed in by how many people? There’s a reason we are all not allowed to try on under-motherfucking-wear in department stores. How about I grab a bag of Cheetos, eat a few handfuls, then put the bag back. There’s a cogent reason that hospitals (try not to) reuse needles.

Yes, someone at Target that day had Dumb-Donuts for breakfast, Stupid-Soup for lunch, and for dinner — you guessed it — Target’s signature Moron-Meatloaf.

Creepy California Karen calls out Conscientious Chicano Craftsman

I hate her.

She took too many Valium and Percocet shooters and electrocuted her brain. She thinks she is the 1941 Nazi Gestapo demanding people’s papers:

“Ihre Papiere bitter.” (“Your papers please.)

*Sie sieht sie an* “Aber… diese Papiere sind nicht in Ordnung.” (*looks them over* “But… these papers are not in order”).

What papers is she even talking about? I don’t have any papers. I guess I have my birth certificate, but I sure as $hiite don’t carry it around with me in case Gladas Cravats needs to see some ID. The brother asks her the best question: “Are you immigration?” This stymies her a sec and then just demands his papers again.

I hate her so much.

We have Spanish-speaking readers in the Rep, and I don’t know if you caught it, but CA Karen just at the very end calls the brother a mariposa — a faggot — and she didn’t even gender the noun correctly. What about that blowing of the kiss in the beginning mean? Was that her gangsta-mafioso kiss of death! I think this brother is well within his right to levy a hate crime and sexual harassment charge.

Hooo My God… the Chineez!

I’d say this rude(?) racist(?) chineez chica pretty much has us all covered. We can say that I fall under the Honkie/Frog category, whereas avid SOFREP reader Mic-Mac falls into (I believe) the Honkie/Mick category. I noticed she double-tapped the Italians twice there (Mick, Wop) on her shirt. This is fun; let’s all stand up one at a time, say our names, and reveal what categories we fall under.

Saaay… looky there, it appears she quite conveniently left out “Chink” and “Gook” — whhhaaat’s that all about?? Well, what are you gonna do, huh? It’s a world gone mad, and now it’s a mad world with a Yellow Plague Pandemic — let them eat cake and wear brash shirts!

This type of shirt didn’t exist when I was going through grammar school; had it, I would have purchased one each in five different colors for the school week.

Compatible couples in Chiner typically share much in common; enjoy the same things… but as far as the female’s “fulfillment” in this relationship goes, she’s likely to fall short with that Chineez guy.

Hello! that sweatshirt reads like the title to a Renaissance allegorical fresco.

Kungfucius was a wise philosopher, however, he was accomplished in the use of hyperbole — beauty typically drops off after the LSD orgy with about three dudes.

COVID Craig Crandle Cries COVID; Converts to Credulous and Conveniently Croaks

The 30-year-old Texas man’s last words according to the duty staff on the scene were:

“I think I made a mistake. I thought this was a hoax, but it’s not.”

That is a sad ultimate demise for a brother; sadder though that he fits into the category of toilet seat licker fad-boy. What do we have now in our country: some 140,000 true believers in the lethality of COVID? I think if I played Russian Roulette, the last words out of my mouth as the bullet sliced through my pea-brain would be:

“Aw, dang… I should have just stayed home and Door Dashed in some Chineez.”

Geo’s pun meme of the week:

By Almighty God and with honor,
geo sends