If I am not indefinitely detained in a federal facility following this article,  I will cover my interrogation period in my next article. Yes, I beat you to it!

OK, so hands down I’ve been told again and again throughout my life to have a plan for everything. Apparently I’m the only one who took it as far as a plan to destroy the world. After all, aliens, the terrorist at a 0.00001 confidence interval might win, or the communist could rise. Who knows; but I have a plan if it all goes to hell.

Cool, I got this. All I would need to do is initiate a large nuclear fire near a fault line grid that connects to Yellowstone National Park. Too easy.

All that kit; well it really wouldn’t be too much. For the sake of argument in this no holds barred, steel cage, death match, worse case scenario and in an effort to avoid strenuous details. I’m tactically and technically competent enough to field acquisition the materials required to pull this off en route.

I developed this plan long ago, when the Yucca Mountain Program was active, and I was but a wee Sapper cutting my teeth during the early GWOT era. Yucca was developed in 1987, as a long-term, solution to hold the nation’s radioactive waste in a secure subterranean containment facility in the Nevada desert. Although the project was shut down in 2010, and a study by the Blue Ribbon Commission on America’s Nuclear Future was commissioned to find an alternative solution. The BRC released their findings in 2012, but no real direct actions have been taken to source any of the suggested recommendations in the BRC’s report.

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The proposed Yucca Site. Image courtesy of the Nuclear Energy Institue.

The Yucca site would have been perfect for my plan thanks to the planned large amount of nuclear material which would have been on site to burn. Yucca’s location along the various fault lines in the Western United States also made it a prime location, which could have theoretically disrupted the adjacent fault lines to the necessary levels required to erupt the Yellowstone site.

This small setback leaves us with a few alternatives – plans on plans after all.

The most recent Government Accountability Office report estimates a total of 83,000 metric tons of nuclear waste, which is stored at 35 sites across the continental United States. This works out a little better for us in the long haul. In this scenario, it has gone down, the guards have locked down the storage sites, and gone home to defend their families. So we’re going on a convoy, and we will be nuclear waste shopping all the way to Yellowstone.