And this is why you can’t have nice things.

Good god, man . . . Get a girlfriend, a hobby, a dog – anything?! Where are your friends and family, and why do they hate you enough to not break the world down to Barney-math for you?

Setting your balls on fire, only makes you ballless; and what is the win there? Discount sex change? Although, with an anatomy book, and if you got the balls for it. I bet you could get away with nailing your scrotum into Red Square. You’re going to need to be looking at a serious PSI charged air hammer that works off of compressed air cans.

Brah, you cannot be aiming to go manual hammer to nail on a layer of cobblestone, which rests on top of steel reinforced concrete. If you are . . . Man, I suppose this is adventure Darwinism.