“Clearly, all you need is a fresh pair of Ranger Panties and a patriotic spirit, and you’re ready to take on the world.”
— Adam Clark Estes
A “Brief” History
Whether you love or hate silkies or ranger panties, these (uncomfortably) short shorts are definitely here to stay. They were first issued in the 1970s to the US Army Rangers as part of their Physical Training uniform. Later on, the US Marines adopted the use of these shorts and called them “silkies” because, you know, they had to have their nickname for it.
What People Say About It
These shorts are not only for soldiers, as civilians also fell in love with the ranger panties. Based on the Amazon reviews that these shorts have garnered, it is safe to say that people love them. Who wouldn’t? Soft, excruciatingly short, super comfortable. One review even said that it was a life-changer. Here are some of the other reviews:
“If you don’t like sexy women staring at your member, then these shorts are not for you. These are absolutely the best shorts in the history of ever. There is Nothing you can’t do in them….hit a 300lb squat? Pffff… Swim? Well, they will dry instantly when you get out of the pool. Sleep in them… Like sleeping naked. Mow the yard in July, and you won’t break a sweat. Fight terrorism?…consider the neighborhood safe. The list of things is endless. The only thing I would advise against is, I wouldn’t wear them when the wife hosts a book club.“
“Wearing these shorts in public may cause erratic driving, gasps from women in your neighborhood, and/or laughter and pointing from small children.“
“If you’re tired of shorts that make you look like a circus clown, these might be what you’re looking for… No offense to the clown community.“
“These are REALLY short, REALLY thin, and REALLY transparent. Unless you’re attending Pride, you will scar every child and elderly woman you pass on your run as these will define your anatomy like a vacuum wrapped sausage.“
“This product makes those in my presence uncomfortable. It is the very embodiment of the American way. Tremble before me in my man-candy panties as I drink my protein shake in preparation for squat day.“
Did any of these reviews convince you to hoard them? If not yet, then perhaps you might want to check out silkies’ very own Facebook page with 134,955 likes and 134,832 followers as of writing.
Writer Adam Clark Estes said he was inspired by the Amazon reviews and decided to try these silkies himself. He wrote, “Ranger Panties are inappropriately short for many social engagements. I wanted to test the shorts in as many different environments as possible but was largely unable to do so because my girlfriend would not let me leave the house while wearing them. (She did not specify a reason).“
But their design does serve some important functions beyond the Chippendale Dancer tryout energy they give off. They dry quickly when wet, so you don’t chafe which is a Hell all unto itself. They will not trap sand or mud when you exit the water(see Chafing on steroids). They are made to break at the hip when walking and will not rub against your skin mid-thigh. It’s not that big a deal on a trip to Home Depot, but on a twenty-mile march, this matters.
Have you tried wearing ranger panties? We’d love to hear about your experience!
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